Wonder What's Next...

Today my girlfriend of 2 and a half years broke up with me.

On Saturday, she went to a church camp and was there until Monday. She had met a guy there named Hunter... a 15 year old that lives an hour away from her house. She told me that she had feelings for him and she wanted to pursue a relationship with him, and just be friends with me. I tried my hardest to convince her that she was making a pretty ridiculous decision, but she didn't want to hear anything I was saying.

At this point, I don't know what to do... with the death of my rabbit not too long ago, now this... I'm depressed. I love her so much. 2 and a half years is a long time, and to through it all away for someone she knew for 2 days. How well can you know someone in 2 days... you can't. I don't wanna give up, I want to keep trying, but she seems so set on doing this, I feel there's no point in even attempting... Call this blog and even me EMO is you want, but this is true life. This shit happens. Gangsters get dumped and heartbroken, label me and this blog all you want, but this is real life. My life. I feel torn up inside, I'm scared cuz now I have no one. My life and future was laid out with her. All the time and money I invested in her and this relationship was, in the end, for nothing. I hear everyone say "I'll never get over her, she was the one..." even I've said that in the past about ex's, but her... she was the one... And even if I do find someone else, I'm afraid because I know that no one will ever be like her. I remember when I was maybe 8 or 9, me and my sister were playing, and we both wrote a list of the perfect girlfriend./boyfriend. And I remember what I wrote stuck with me, even to this day. And she... she met every single criteria on that list. I can't let her go, I need to do something. I don't want to be desperate, but I am... I'm in love with her.

We'd always tell each other we'd love each other "forever and for always"... just like every couple, I know... I don't know... I really don't... It's hard to keep it together... to even type this... I just needed to let it out, to see if it would help, but it makes it worse. Fuck my life. My pet dies... my relationship dies... Wonder what's next...